The Birth Story of Emery | Jacksonville Birth Photographer
The Birth Story of Emery in his mama’s words:
At 40 weeks and 3 days we headed to The Family Birthplace in preparation to meet our son. It was finally time!
I had taken the classes, watched the videos, read the books, scoured online forums, and repacked my hospital bag at least six times - but I knew I still wasn’t prepared. On the outside, I looked calm and collected but the truth is - I was a bundle of nerves. I was afraid! Was induction the right choice? Would I have a smooth delivery or end up needing emergency intervention? Would I come out on the other side with a healthy baby? Only time would tell, and the time was now!!
We arrived in the early evening and once I was taken to the birthing suite, it was a furry of activity - I joked that the team at The Family Birth Place worked together like a pit crew - and before I knew it, the forms were signed, the blood drawn, the Covid test done and monitors placed. This was really happening!!
I had a hard time sitting still - so I paced, I bounced, I tried to settled in. I nested - I laid out the outfits I had selected for baby, I displayed the letterboard with his name, I unpacked my suitcase like I was moving in!
I had been having regular contractions for days but just being there seemed to intensify them - or at least my attention to them. After all the checking in and unpacking, my midwife arrived to make a plan. Even though I was being induced - I wanted to avoid as much chemical intervention as possible so we started with a sweep and things got going!
I tried to distract myself with tv and the labor ball but things were getting real! I couldn’t help but reflect on the past 10 months - although I didn’t have anything to compare it to, I knew my pregnancy had been different. My pandemic pregnancy was filled with naps, and socially distanced grocery delivery - it had not been filled with baby showers and celebrations. I had not struggled with strangers touching my belly, or awkward maternity outfits in the Florida heat - I basically hadn’t left my house in months. I hadn’t really been bothered by the prenatal appointments my husband couldn’t attend, but I was suddenly hit with the fact that we were about to bring a perfect and vulnerable child into a world that was pretty scary at the moment - and that we would have no help or support to lean on. There were no anxious grandparents waiting in the lobby or hovering nearby. My sister wasn’t waiting in the wings to make sure we ate or slept. There was no group of friends scheduled to drop off meals. It was just us! Quite suddenly I realized the past 283 days had gone too quickly and I wanted just a bit more time to keep my precious baby safe in my womb - but it was time. Time to push through, time to carry on - time to become a mom!
My midwife returned and we needed to make some decisions. We elected to continue down a gentle induction path and utilize a foley bulb instead of chemical interventions. Once it was placed - we were off to the races!!!
Contractions were strong! I didn’t have time to focus on my fears anymore - I needed to focus on walking, bouncing, and breathing. I leaned into the pain and wondered to myself how much more intensity I should expect- and if I’d be able to handle it.
My husband had worked all day and I knew we were in for a long night. I knew I would need his strength to carry me through delivery - I knew he needed to rest. So he curled up on a much too tiny couch and got his last nap as soon-to-be daddy. I watched him sleep peacefully and felt gratitude wash over me. I had chosen the perfect partner and we were about to start a new chapter. The most precious chapter. We had over a decade of chapters behind us, but this next one: we had waited for - we had planned for - we had prayed for - we had worked through loss for! I pictured him holding our son, laughing, learning, and growing. I couldn’t wait for “we” to become “the three of us.”
Several hours passed and it was time again to make some decisions to keep the process moving. My contractions had slowed and become further apart so it was time for some medication. Shorty there after, it was also time for some pain relief! I was hoping to avoid an epidural so we opted to try nitrous. When I say “hoping to avoid” what I mean is - I spent my entire pregnancy saying I didn’t want one. I can tell you all the reasons right now; I didn’t want a catheter, I didn’t want to be stuck in bed, I was afraid I would have complications, women had been having unmedicated births for millennia - blah, blah, blah… However, as I sat there sucking down nitrous with each contraction, I couldn’t remember a single one of those reasons. We were 12 hours in - I was exhausted and I was ready for an epidural. About the same time, my doula was arriving and I needed my husband to wake up and get in the action!
The epidural was placed without complication and suddenly I was quite comfortable! It was the wee hours of a rainy morning and today was birth day!!! I was finally comfortable enough that I could relax. After enjoying a few popsicles with the nurses, it was time for a nap. I drifted to sleep knowing that soon it would be time to work harder than I ever had before. Soon it would be time to take my place as a mother.
A short while later, my waters were broken and before I knew it - it was time to push! The scene was both vivid and surreal. Activity buzzed about the room. Multiple nurses were preparing the isolette and changing the bed position; my midwife was donning full mask and gown. As another nurse entered, I saw the light in the hallway above my door flashing. This was REALLY happening! It was my turn!
With my husband on my left, a nurse on my right, my doula behind me, and my midwife in front of me - I pushed. Surrounded by love and encouragement and patience - I pushed. Like an athlete in an event, I could hear “Go Amanda, yes! You got this! Good job!” But they were almost echos as I focused inward to gather every bit of strength and courage I could muster. I locked eyes briefly with my husband - drawing on his strength, watching us transform together. He had been my rock throughout my pregnancy and this was no different. After what seemed both like forever and only an instant - I heard the most beautiful sound: my sons first cry as he was laid upon my chest. We had done it! We had made it through multiple losses, we had made it through a pandemic pregnancy, and now we had made it through delivery too.
The emotion flooded over me and I cried like I had never cried before. As I clung to my perfect, tiny child, I wept tears of joy for his safe arrival. I watched in amazement as my husband gingerly cut the umbilical cord. We had made it, we had done it together. And our journey of parenthood had finally begun.
